Money's worth at Perth
Many of you, I understand, stormed into Sulekha’s office, insisting that they ought to get my views on the recently concluded test series in Australia.
Ok, that may be a slight exaggeration.
What I meant was some of you ought to have planned to storm into Sulekha’s office to demand that they obtain my views. As none of you seem to show any evidence of such planning, here’s my unsolicited report.
We lost at Melbourne and Sydney, but Kangaroolations to the Indian team on winning the Perth test. Call me a maverick, rebel or a freak, but in the face of such strong criticism, I have always believed that, at the end of the day, the team that bats more sensibly, bowls more intelligently and fields more diligently gets to win. At the end of the day, your total number of runs in both the innings must be more than your opponents’.
Some cynics insist that what is more important, at the end of the day, is that you must humour the umpires and keep them on the right side. But, I have always believed that you can keep the umpire on the right, only if you are bowling over the wicket. When you bowl around the wicket, he will necessarily be on your left. Of course, if you are a left-arm bowler, it works the other way, but you get the message.
Incidentally why do commentators keep using expressions such as “at the end of the day” and “ I have always believed…?
As Don Bradman said once, “At the end of the day, what matters is not only what you did at the end of the day. What you did during the rest of the day is equally important.” You won’t find this in any compilation of quotations, and this is the first time that it has appeared in print. I heard that famous quote of Don Bradman in a Tamil remake movie called Billa Bradman. I have always believed that movies are better than books.
There were several interesting moments in the test match. But, when the task was daunting, Ponting was found wanting and this will keep his critics taunting and haunting him. He batted miserably. He was quite comfortable against R.P.Singh, but struggled against Ishant Sharma. No wonder that , by the end of the day, (this time it is literal), he kept humming the tune, “I shall Singh, I shall Singh, I shan’t Sharma, I shan’t Sharma”. This soulful humming provided him much-needed relief. I have always believed that music is a great palliative for a troubled mind.
Some people describe this as the biggest win ever for India. This is meaningless. When a nerdy looking commentator asked Rahul Dravid, which win he considered more special, Perth, Adelaide, Trent Bridge, Johannesburg or Kolkata, he rightly said that he had always believed that, at the end of the day, each was special in its own way.
I am reminded of the questions addressed to a guy called Arasu in a Tamil magazine, “Kumudam”. A typical question would be, “Compare : Sridevi’s eyes, Khusboo’s teeth and Hema Malini’s cheeks”. The venerable Arasu’s answer would be, ‘One twinkles, the other sparkles, the third wrinkles. Also, one sizzles, the other dazzles, while the third puzzles” or something equally profound. What he means to convey is that each feature of the anatomies of different actresses is special in its own way. Don’t compare. I have always believed that the same truth applies to test match wins as well. Don’t compare.
Can we repeat the performance in the ODIs?. Let’s keep our fingers crossed. Although, I admit, it is tough to walk around for a week with crossed fingers. But, I have always believed that no sacrifice is too big for the cause of the nation. At the end of the day, each one of us must do whatever we can and always believe in ourselves.
Some cynics insist that what is more important, at the end of the day, is that you must humour the umpires and keep them on the right side. But, I have always believed that you can keep the umpire on the right, only if you are bowling over the wicket. When you bowl around the wicket, he will necessarily be on your left. Of course, if you are a left-arm bowler, it works the other way, but you get the message.
Incidentally why do commentators keep using expressions such as “at the end of the day” and “ I have always believed…?
As Don Bradman said once, “At the end of the day, what matters is not only what you did at the end of the day. What you did during the rest of the day is equally important.” You won’t find this in any compilation of quotations, and this is the first time that it has appeared in print. I heard that famous quote of Don Bradman in a Tamil remake movie called Billa Bradman. I have always believed that movies are better than books.
There were several interesting moments in the test match. But, when the task was daunting, Ponting was found wanting and this will keep his critics taunting and haunting him. He batted miserably. He was quite comfortable against R.P.Singh, but struggled against Ishant Sharma. No wonder that , by the end of the day, (this time it is literal), he kept humming the tune, “I shall Singh, I shall Singh, I shan’t Sharma, I shan’t Sharma”. This soulful humming provided him much-needed relief. I have always believed that music is a great palliative for a troubled mind.
Some people describe this as the biggest win ever for India. This is meaningless. When a nerdy looking commentator asked Rahul Dravid, which win he considered more special, Perth, Adelaide, Trent Bridge, Johannesburg or Kolkata, he rightly said that he had always believed that, at the end of the day, each was special in its own way.
I am reminded of the questions addressed to a guy called Arasu in a Tamil magazine, “Kumudam”. A typical question would be, “Compare : Sridevi’s eyes, Khusboo’s teeth and Hema Malini’s cheeks”. The venerable Arasu’s answer would be, ‘One twinkles, the other sparkles, the third wrinkles. Also, one sizzles, the other dazzles, while the third puzzles” or something equally profound. What he means to convey is that each feature of the anatomies of different actresses is special in its own way. Don’t compare. I have always believed that the same truth applies to test match wins as well. Don’t compare.
Can we repeat the performance in the ODIs?. Let’s keep our fingers crossed. Although, I admit, it is tough to walk around for a week with crossed fingers. But, I have always believed that no sacrifice is too big for the cause of the nation. At the end of the day, each one of us must do whatever we can and always believe in ourselves.
As I am about to file this report, news comes trickling in that Justice Hansen has delivered his verdict, in the Harbhajan Singh imbroglio.
The text of the verdict delivered by Justice Hansen refers to the following cross-questioning of witness:
“Mr V.R.MANOHAR (lawyer, defending Harbhajan) : I put it to you that apart from the other Indian abuses he said to you the words “teri maki”?
Symonds: Possibly; I don’t recall, I don’t know that language.”
Finally, as we all know, the more serious charge of racism was dropped and Harbhajan was punished for a smaller offence of having used abusive language. Sharad Pawar and others have gone on record that justice had finally been done, and he would never have tolerated it, if any Indian cricketer had been accused of racial abuse.
I am personally very unimpressed with this Manohar. Can’t the BCCI find a lawyer who is slightly more proficient in English? Someone who can use a grammatically more correct name of “I am Manohar” instead of “V.R.Manohar”?
That side, I am very impressed with his questioning technique and his understanding of the nuances of law. Should be used in other situations, say, one in which an accused is under trial, for an attempted rape.
Defence lawyer to victim: I put it to you that defendant was not trying to rape you, but merely trying to choke you to death.
Victim: Now that you tell me, that’s quite possible,. If he had only mentioned his true intentions, I wouldn’t have panicked
Judge : Case dismissed. Prosecution has failed to provide sufficient evidence. Defendant is acquitted of the more serious charge of rape. However, for the minor offence of attempted murder, which the accused has graciously admitted as true, I fine him an amount equal to half his monthly salary.
.
“Mr V.R.MANOHAR (lawyer, defending Harbhajan) : I put it to you that apart from the other Indian abuses he said to you the words “teri maki”?
Symonds: Possibly; I don’t recall, I don’t know that language.”
Finally, as we all know, the more serious charge of racism was dropped and Harbhajan was punished for a smaller offence of having used abusive language. Sharad Pawar and others have gone on record that justice had finally been done, and he would never have tolerated it, if any Indian cricketer had been accused of racial abuse.
I am personally very unimpressed with this Manohar. Can’t the BCCI find a lawyer who is slightly more proficient in English? Someone who can use a grammatically more correct name of “I am Manohar” instead of “V.R.Manohar”?
That side, I am very impressed with his questioning technique and his understanding of the nuances of law. Should be used in other situations, say, one in which an accused is under trial, for an attempted rape.
Defence lawyer to victim: I put it to you that defendant was not trying to rape you, but merely trying to choke you to death.
Victim: Now that you tell me, that’s quite possible,. If he had only mentioned his true intentions, I wouldn’t have panicked
Judge : Case dismissed. Prosecution has failed to provide sufficient evidence. Defendant is acquitted of the more serious charge of rape. However, for the minor offence of attempted murder, which the accused has graciously admitted as true, I fine him an amount equal to half his monthly salary.
.
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